I’ve been thinking a lot about fears.
I hear women say they are afraid of makeup all the time and I’ve never really understood it.
But it washes right off?
Why would that be scary?
I just thought “Hey, I guess I’m just fearless cause I totally don’t get that.”
When we were picking a marketing theme for the month at our MC meeting the team brought it up. They were talking about how so many women say they want to try it but they’re afraid. So we spent a lot of time thinking about fears. We listened to TED talks and podcasts, read about fear and tried to identify and ‘face’ some of our own fears. Which of course got me wondering…
What am I afraid of?
Yeah, I’m deathly scared of spiders (I’m not alone in this, apparently it’s the 2nd most feared thing in America!) but it doesn’t seem very effective to force myself to watch arachnophobia and get a pet tarantula or something. That can’t really be the meaning of “face your fears”
And I’m pretty terrified to sleep alone in a creaky house, but there again…I don’t have a lot to gain by doing so anyway and if I was forced to, I could totally handle it. That’s when I got to thinking that maybe I was looking at fears all wrong. Maybe they’re more subtle than that, maybe that’s what makes them so dangerous?
Once I really started thinking about it they started coming to me.
One thing that came to my mind was, and I’m really embarrassed to admit this one, I used to take photos for people. I sort of just fell into it. I was always doing makeup and taking photos of the makeup and working with brides and I just started taking photos as well. I had an artistic eye for composition and I understood the basics of photoshop but I had no idea how to work the camera.
Auto setting or bust.
The longer I took photos the worse I felt about not knowing more about how to do it.
But I was too afraid of admitting that I didn’t know at that point to find out! After working it on Auto for at least a year (probably longer) I finally “faced my fear” and asked a photographer friend to teach me some things.
And what would have once been this:
Now became this:
In 5 minutes I had enough information to do a lot of things I could never do on my camera before.
Fear kept me in the dark.
Another big fear I have is not being liked. It petrifies me. But why? Logically I know that people are very different with different tastes. It doesn’t make someone bad or wrong just because someone else doesn’t like them. Nick doesn’t like cream cheese for heaven sake. CREAM CHEESE! I don’t see how that’s possible but it is. If I’m being myself and I’m also being kind and respectful of others and someone doesn’t like me then so be it!
Identifying that and also pointing out the reasons this particular fear isn’t doing me any good kind of inspired me to do something about it.
I’m gonna face my fears and be more worried about saying how I really feel and less worried about what others will do with that information. That’s their business! I want to learn the art of being truly kind and generous with other people’s feelings while still being 100 percent authentic. That’s my goal.
…I’m also going to learn to braid. Because a mixture of fear and laziness have kept me away for far too long.
So now I’ve got to know and reeeaaaally think about it. What fears are holding you back?
do you have any?