My Favorites My Life


I love flaws.

I have a big scar on my leg I got at summer camp one year.
The true story of how I got it is quite ordinary and boring but that’s not what I think of when I look at it.
I think of me and my best friend Shelly, at 16 deciding the story was rubbish and, since everyone within spitting distance asked about it, we needed a better one.
We concocted this big ol’ elaborate tale involving me and a jealous cowgirl …with spurs.
It became our best conversation starter, the funny go-to story when we needed an ice breaker with cute boys.
We never told any one the truth. Somehow it wasn’t really a lie if we were both in on it.
We told it so often that sometimes still, when people ask about my scar, I have to remind myself what really happened.

I have a mole on my chest, too.  This has always served as a very scientific measurement. If I can see the mole, my shirt is too low. Pretty great placement if you ask me.

I also have scars on my heart, that I cherish as much or more.

Anytime I pass a baseball field I think of my oldest brother, who passed away years ago.  At first it hurts a little, but then I think about how much I loved to watch him play, I think about his big hugs that felt like being covered in a homemade quilt and how his smile made me smile and just thinking about it now,
still does.

When I see someone who looks lonely and lost I remember the times when I felt that way. I remember walking home from work in scroungy clothes that didn’t fit my very uncomfortable pregnant body. I remember looking in neighbors warm windows and wishing I was living their life instead, wondering how I ended up in mine.  Because of my scars I remember exactly how that felt. If not for that I probably wouldn’t be so compelled to reach out and help like so many friends or nice strangers did for me.

Flaws are beautiful. I think they bring us much closer together than “perfection” ever could.

So have fun with makeup and hair and clothes, but never use them to cover up who you really are, because nothing can compare to that.

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  • Reply
    September 30, 2014 at 8:47 am

    Love this…

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    September 30, 2014 at 8:47 am

    drops the mike, walks off stage…… Bravo…… beautiful, Cara. and…. beautiful Cara (gotta love commas)

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    September 30, 2014 at 8:51 am

    Well said and perfect timing. Thank you!st

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    September 30, 2014 at 8:53 am

    You are simply a breath of fresh air. Thank you for your innocently lovely perspective. xo

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    September 30, 2014 at 8:53 am

    Awesome Cara, thanks for sharing and encouraging all of us. You are so beautiful inside and out!

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    September 30, 2014 at 8:56 am

    That was beautiful Cara… I’ve thought of this often, when I’m going through something but don’t understand why….the lessons learned, have given me numerous opportunities to minister, help, encourage and empathize with people that I never would have been able to if I hadn’t gone through it myself 🙂

  • Reply
    Deborah Sacchi
    September 30, 2014 at 9:00 am

    Flaws are what make you uniquely beautiful you!

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    September 30, 2014 at 9:07 am

    Perfect! thanks so much for sharing=)

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    September 30, 2014 at 9:10 am

    I think this is my favorite post of yours, ever.

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      October 1, 2014 at 7:11 pm

      This is definitely my most favorite post EVER. In the history of posts

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    September 30, 2014 at 9:16 am

    Thanks for this!

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    September 30, 2014 at 9:28 am

    This was just beautiful. Thank you! I have my scars too, large, small, inside and out. I appreciate and have gratitude towards them all. They are what formed my compassion, empathy and grace. Thank you so much for reminding me.

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    September 30, 2014 at 9:40 am

    I needed this today. In a low time. I am guilty of reading your blog and thinking you have a ‘flawless, perfect’ life. 🙁 Forgive me for my jealousy. We all have scars. Thanks for the reminder and being real.

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    September 30, 2014 at 9:45 am

    Beautiful inside and out. 🙂

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    September 30, 2014 at 9:49 am

    Beautiful. Thank you!

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    Michelle H
    September 30, 2014 at 9:50 am

    Beautifully said.

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    Lily Hay
    September 30, 2014 at 9:56 am

    Cara – you truly are beautiful and inspiring both inside and out. Your honest stories draw me in every time. Your tribute today for your brother made me think of my friend, Tracie Hitz, who lost her brother earlier this year to cancer. She’s setting up a scholarship fund this month in his honor. I thought you might appreciate how much she loves and misses her brother, too.

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    September 30, 2014 at 10:11 am

    What a sweet and thoughtful post. I love your wonderful perspective.

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    tara farmer
    September 30, 2014 at 10:15 am

    I love, this post. You are so insightful! This is so true!! Beautifully said!

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    September 30, 2014 at 10:16 am

    Thank you for your wise words. This post is “perfect”!

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    September 30, 2014 at 10:34 am

    This is beautiful.

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    September 30, 2014 at 10:45 am

    Just when I think your blog couldn’t get any better. Beautifully said!

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    September 30, 2014 at 10:46 am

    Thank you Cara. Your words are so true and its good to be reminded to keep everything in perspective and not get carried away by obsessing over our flaws and tribulations.

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    September 30, 2014 at 11:33 am

    Absolutely lovely. Thank you

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    Whovian Gran
    September 30, 2014 at 11:39 am

    Thank you for the reminder of what makes life beautiful!

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    Debbie Skwirsk
    September 30, 2014 at 12:03 pm

    You never cease to amaze me. Thank God for the opportunity to know you with your big ol’ heart…flaws and all.

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    sonia ferreira
    September 30, 2014 at 12:32 pm

    best post ever

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    Miss Viola Swamp (@imaqt209421)
    September 30, 2014 at 12:34 pm

    Love you <3

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    September 30, 2014 at 1:04 pm

    Thank you for that beautiful reminder!

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    September 30, 2014 at 1:07 pm

    Cara this was perfect, and really why you glow!

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    September 30, 2014 at 1:29 pm

    You are so much wiser then your years. You brought tears to my eyes.

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    September 30, 2014 at 5:22 pm

    Beautiful words of encouragement. Only can God take a great mess and make greatness!!!

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    September 30, 2014 at 5:51 pm

    Seriously, this post is perfect. The world could use a few more people with this perspective. Xo

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    September 30, 2014 at 6:22 pm

    This is just beautiful Cara! Thank you for who you are and what you write and share…you are that much more beautiful because of your honesty. :o)

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    September 30, 2014 at 6:38 pm

    Wow…I’ve always loved your blog. But this post? It’s on an entirely different level. Such a beautiful sentiment. Loved this!

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    September 30, 2014 at 8:16 pm

    What a beautiful tribute to a brother gone but not forgotten you have a fantastic
    Gift in your writing and putting a piece of you in every message
    Thanks for being you cara xo

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    September 30, 2014 at 11:10 pm

    …this post is exactly why people love you.

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    Tj Richards
    October 1, 2014 at 12:44 am

    Couldn’t have read this at a better time! God Bless You!

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    Kiss & Make-up
    October 1, 2014 at 12:56 am

    What a lovely post, and it’s so inspirational. It’s true, we all have scars, some visible on the outside and some on the inside. And instead of regretting them we should embrace them because they all tell a story.

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    Nadine Le Maitre
    October 1, 2014 at 12:59 am

    That’s such a moving part of your life and just like Tj Richards, i couldn’t have read this at a better time too! God Bless You!

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    October 1, 2014 at 1:20 am

    I have also lost my brother several years ago and many times remember his sweet devilish smile and his big hugs that also remind me of a warm blanket. Lucky for me he had a 2 month old daughter when he past, so he left a piece of him with us. She is a soft reminder of him in so many ways. Thank you for your warm thoughtful compassion and passing it along to others to always remind us our scars, whether large or small, inside or out are part of who we are and what made us what we are today. You are a beautiful person Cara! 🙂

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    Nicole B.
    October 1, 2014 at 3:15 am

    So touching. Thank you for writing this.

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    Jessica Pierson
    October 1, 2014 at 4:32 am

    The last sentence of that post will go on a sticky note on my computer monitor at work, where I only put the best quotes, the ones I need to hear on a regular basis.

    I sometimes try to hide myself behind clothes since I am overweight and really not happy about it. But despite my weight, I can climb 69 flights of stairs in under 35 minutes, I have survived 4 bouts with a very rare, painful disease that no one knows about (and may come back at any time) (and yes I have two scars on my chest that are each at least 8 inches long, two more that are more like 3-4 inches each), and a drug addict ex boyfriend who happened to be my first love. I have rescued two puppy mill dogs who are now, despite how scared and frail they were when I got them, now the absolute joys of my life.

    So thank you for this one. You’re right I’m not perfect, but I think I’ve come pretty far from where I was. And no one can understand all that but me.

    As always you rock and love forever 🙂

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    Alicia McLain
    October 1, 2014 at 4:58 am

    As much as I love your videos and tutorials, this is by far my most favorite post I have ever read by you. I can agree that scars can be beautiful reminders and all it takes to view a scar as a beautiful thing is a change in perspective.

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    Heidi D.
    October 1, 2014 at 5:00 am

    Such a well-written and true piece. It’s hard to always see the truth in your words but time really does make things much clearer.

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    October 1, 2014 at 5:07 am

    One of my Favorite posts of yours. Thank you..I need to be remind of this. I get so caught up in Working out, shoes, hair, fashion sometimes I need a reminder, these scares and differences make me ME. 🙂

  • Reply
    October 1, 2014 at 5:31 am

    Cara, your words are so eloquently written. 🙂 Like a previous commenter stated – you are “a breath of fresh air” – thank you for being you and for inspiring so many of us to be ourselves 🙂

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    Ariana Raftopoulos
    October 1, 2014 at 6:54 am

    You are such an inspiration Cara. I need to remember that the scars on my heart have just as important stories as the physical ones!

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    Nancy Block
    October 1, 2014 at 8:22 am

    I wonder how old you are? You are so stinking adorable. You are so genuine and relatable. I love your posts.

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    October 1, 2014 at 8:57 am

    I’m learning to cherish my imperfection. I love you so much Cara. This post was absolutely beautiful.

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    Jenny Kottke
    October 1, 2014 at 9:06 am

    Thank you thank you!! I’m thinking the type of women that follow your blog are probably of the most beautiful kind. They come back to you not only for outward beauty inspiration, but that inner beauty that shines through you as well. Thank you also, for sharing that piece of your heart that belongs to your brother. I bet he’s so proud of his beautiful and lovely sister, and sends you that love right back.

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    Christina Emery
    October 1, 2014 at 9:15 am

    This is beautiful! I couldn’t agree with you more. What a beautiful heart and soul you have! <3

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    October 1, 2014 at 9:37 am

    Geeze this made me cry.

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    October 1, 2014 at 10:30 am

    Perfect message!!! Thanks for your thoughts!!

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    October 1, 2014 at 10:44 am

    where’s the like button?

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    October 1, 2014 at 1:04 pm

    You’re amazing. I’m so glad I follow your blog 🙂

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    October 1, 2014 at 4:35 pm

    Well said Cara! We all have some sort of scars, inside and out, and it completely shapes who we are now. I have learned to embrace all of my scars as well (even the ones the naked eye cannot see). Thanks for being such an open and honest person and for sharing your stories with everyone.

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    October 1, 2014 at 4:42 pm

    You are good at what you do but I think you missed your calling–you should be a writer! The blogs I love the most are the ones you’ve written from the heart–the one about your mom’s ageless beauty, the heartbreaker about your ex-husband, the love story about Nick, and now this one. You truly are a talented writer and express your thoughts and perspective in a most meaningful way.

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    October 1, 2014 at 10:12 pm

    Wow, Cara! I knew you were a talented and humble makeup artist who is so gracious with her clients and followers of social media, your blog, etc. But now you need to add poet, writer, and lover of humanity…Keep spreading your light into the world, You never know who may read your posts and feel uplifted, understood, and validated because of your willingness to be vulnerable and kind. I know I did. And I thank you for that.

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    October 2, 2014 at 2:24 am

    Simply Beautiful 🙂

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    October 2, 2014 at 9:48 am

    You are seriously my favorite! I love how open and raw and honest you are. Thank you for that. It’s refreshing, especially in today’s world.

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    October 2, 2014 at 11:21 am

    I had no idea about your brother. Thank you for sharing that

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    October 3, 2014 at 12:24 am

    I am in love with your blog Cara. Most of all though, it is you and your authenticity, that keeps me coming back….That is all:)

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    Eva Lee
    October 3, 2014 at 8:24 pm

    Beautiful and heartfelt. I love your blog, admire your work, and simply adore you.

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    Ashley | StyleOnHigh
    October 12, 2014 at 4:57 pm

    This made me tear up in the best way- in that I completely related to you and was touched. Thanks for sharing such a beautiful post. 🙂

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    October 28, 2014 at 5:11 am

    Truly beautiful people aren’t afraid to show or share their flaws and imperfections. Thank you for sharing and for the reminder.

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    October 28, 2014 at 7:51 am

    so heartfelt, beautiful. thanks for sharing. xxox

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    I'm The Mami
    November 8, 2014 at 4:03 pm

    A renewed interest in makeup brought me to your blog. Your warm voice and huge heart kept me here. Your talent goes far beyond makeup and hair (though those things are great too!) Love this post.

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    July 23, 2015 at 5:06 am

    Cara, I have a scar on the left side of my chin from a bicycle accident 14 years ago. I have never been able to accept it. I am trying to minimize it by exfoliating, mosterizer, retinol, and a primer before applying a coverup. Do you have any other scar tips? Something that might hide it better? Thanks. I love your advice.

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